Saturday, 3/3/01

Okay... what the hell is going on here? Let me just try to lay this out now. Let's see... two months ago, Andre broke up with his girlfriend. They had been together for six months. Then, about a month ago, Joanne's friend Annemarie broke up with her boyfriend. They were together for god knows how many years, and they were engaged. Two weeks ago it was my turn. We logged five and a half years. Last week, it was Mike, the singer for our band. Maybe a year or so, and I think they were intending to get married. Then today, I'm flipping through my favorite webcomics, and I find this. [The rant is no longer there, but you can guess what happened.] Three years, and they were engaged. Now, I realize that I don't actually know this guy, but earlier I had been reading though his tales of pseudo-conjugal bliss (with some jealousy or nostalgia or what have you), and now to see this... well, it's all just crazy. Is anyone happy? So, anyway. Today had some pluses and minuses, with a negative sum, I guess. Band practice was very good. Fun. Played through the set twice with no major problems, and tried to screw around a little at the end. Afterwards, as we're cleaning up, Mike is going off on how great it is that he just broke up because of all the songwriting inspiration it has provided. I don't say anything. Then he starts asking around to make sure that everyone else is single. Shumway affirms, Chris tells his most recent tale of heartbreak, I don't say anything. Mike asks me directly. I say yes, and leave the room with an armful of audio cables. I then have to sit down, because I'm physically shaking. I'm not sure why the incident affected me so much. Maybe it just caught me off guard. But I had been answering that question in the opposite way for over five years now, and since I've been refusing to think about it for the last two weeks... that was one of the few times that I've had to come face-to-face with the current situation. It was disturbing. Then I went running with Peggy and Chris. That wasn't good, either. Cold weather, fast Chris, and very weak and sore Achilles' tendons. After three miles, I had to stop and walk the rest of the way because my tendons felt like they were on fire and my left foot had literally gone numb. It felt like I was wearing balloon shoes. Or, it would have if there were such a thing as balloon shoes. On top of it all, my stomach is displeased in such as way as to suggest that I'm getting ill. Ain't life beautiful?