Monday, 3/12/01

So, I haven't written in a while. Sorry to disappoint my loyal readers. (I say "readers" because grammatically, zero is treated as plural.) I haven't written because I've been feeling either uninspired or unhappy, and there's not much worth writing about in either case. Actually, for the last couple days, for various independently pathetic reasons, I've been feeling like shit. But I'm not here to talk about that. I'm here to talk about being kicked while I'm down. I'm here to talk about losing the last thing that brought joy into my increasingly miserable existence. Safeway reorganized their bulk food bins. They added dried apricots. They added dried apples. They added dried peaches, plums, and pears. Guess what they removed? That's right -- no more pineapple rings. After circling the bulk food section three times to make sure I didn't miss anything, I simply stopped and stared ahead blindly in stunned disbelief, as my soul crumbled within me. (I honestly did -- I'm not just being dramatic. I probably got funny looks from shoppers who had never seen a spirit crushed in the middle of the supermarket. I really had my heart set on those pineapple rings.) I left Safeway a broken shell of a man. Well, I sort of was already a broken shell of a man when I entered in the first place, but now I'm a broken shell without even the the small comfort of dried pineapple rings. Anyway, I was reading some manga the other day, and I came across the three sweetest words ever spoken. (No, not those stereotypical three words. Those words don't mean shit.) I'm talking about these three words: That's really all I want out of life. Those three words.